It is unfortunately a sad reflection of the society in which we live that assaults against the person are becoming more and more frequent. These assaults can take many forms from street violence to road rage and in some cases can result in serious injury and even death. Workplace assaults are growing more common across the world in hospitals, schools, on public transport and in shops. Dealing with aggression is never comfortable and staff need to have the confidence to handle these difficult situations and the techniques to diffuse them and even to know when to back off. This book will provide valuable guidance to anyone working within the public arena that needs to know how to successfully handle confrontation. In this guide: How to use de escalation techniques including stance and body language How to read and interpret the body language signals that lead to aggression How to handle irate customers.

• awareness of potential behaviour patterns that may lead to aggressiveness • avoidance of situations where the potential for aggressive behaviour exists • interpretation of non-verbal communications signals • control and de-escalation techniques • an outline of techniques for your personal safety and security.

 

Body language is the outward and visible display of our feelings and emotions when we communicate and is often carried out unconsciously or subconsciously. For example, we may be trapped in a conversation with a person with whom we really do not have any liking. Common courtesy and politeness demands that we at least give the impression of listening to what they have to say but what we are really thinking is how we can justifiably escape from this person and get away from the whole situation. We may try not to offend the other person by simply walking away and ignoring what they have to say but our body language can give our true feelings away if they are correctly interpreted by the speaker. For example, we may start fidgeting and moving around, crossing and uncrossing our legs and arms; we may not look at the person directly and let our eyes stray to other areas beyond the immediate vicinity of the speaker; we may constantly look at our watch to check the time. These signs of inattention can be communicated to the speaker who may or may not recognise them. If we are truly interested in what a person has to say we will sit attentively, facing the person and looking at them directly. We may lean towards them so that we are relatively closer to them, thus conveying the message that we are really interested in what they are saying. As with the use of the tone of voice, body language can be interpreted as being opposed to what is actually being said by the use of words when communicating. It can, therefore, be recognised that all three aspects of personal communication – the words spoken, the tone of voice in which those words are spoken and the accompanying body language all play a part in relaying the true meaning of what is being communicated. If any one of these elements is in conflict with the other two elements, then the true meaning of the communication is received as being confused and thereby lost.

 

About the author ix Introduction 1 Self defence for the new millennium 1 How to use this guide 2 What this guide covers 3 What you will learn from this guide 3 1 Victim or victor? 5 In the workplace 6 Something to think about 8 The victim identity 9 In summary 14 2 The chemistry of fear 15 ‘Fight or flee’ reflex 16 In summary 24 3 Fear management 25 Self-confidence 28 Some points on the law 29 In summary 31 4 Approaches to confrontation management 33 Undertaking a risk assessment 33 Tactical communications 35 Goals 35 Personal space or proxemics 35 Components of communication 37 Manner and tone of voice 38 Body language 39 Information reception 40 Listening skills 42 Practicalities 43 Five communication skills (LEAPS) 43 In summary 45 5 Handling the difficult or irate customer 47 5 Step Positive Cycle 47 Example 48 Positioning 53 The environment – seating 54 In summary 58 6 What if it doesn’t work? Dealing with 59 possible threat The law and personal safety 59 Reasonable force 60 Recognition signs 62 In summary 63 7 Conflict resolution 65 Profiled offender behaviour 66 The warning signs of attack 66 Reasonable defender response 69 Deadly force 71 In summary 72 8 Impact factors 73 Sex/age/size/strength 73 Skill levels 74 Exhaustion 75 Injury 76 Numbers 77 Special knowledge 77 Drugs and alcohol 77 Mental impairment 78 Weapons 79 Imminent danger 80 Position of disadvantage 81 Willingness to resist 82 In summary 83 9 Options 85 Create space between defender and aggressor 85 Issue verbal commands 86 Stance: move to establish control 86 Warning signals 87 Prolonged eye contact 88 Facial colour changes 88 Standing tall with head back 88 Large extravagant movements 89 Ground kicking 89 Accelerated breathing rate 89 Contradiction of stated intent 90 In summary 91 10 Danger signs – possible assault imminent 93 Fist clenching 94 Facial colour pales 94 Lips tighten over teeth 94 Eyebrows drop and chin drops 95 Hands above waist 95 Shoulders tense 95 Stance 95 Target acquisition glance 96 In summary 97 11 Practicalities 99 LOOK 100 In summary 102 12 What next? 105 And finally 108 Appendix 111 Useful web sites 111 Further reading 112 Other Step by Step Guides 113

 

Easy Step By Step Guide to Handling Confrontation by Gerry Williams
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